OTHERHOOD: CHILDLESS, CHILDFREE & CHILD ADJACENT
Kathryn van Beek, Iona Winter, Henrietta Bollinger + Lily Duval
In Aotearoa the number of people who will never have children is growing. Kathryn van Beek, one of the Otherhood anthology’s three co-editors, is joined by contributors Iona Winter, Henrietta Bollinger and Lily Duval for a more inclusive conversation about what makes a fulfilling life.
As Jackie Lee Morrison points out in a review of Otherhood for Kete, the population birth rate in Aotearoa last year was 1.56 births per woman. Compared to the global population replacement birth rate of 2.1 babies per woman (Lancet Medical Journal, March 2024), this would suggest that a number of families in our country are childless. So, why are we so obsessed with the childbirth and child-rearing capabilities of others?
In Otherhood, co-editors Alie Benge, Kathryn van Beek and Lil O’Brien have assembled the perspectives of 36 writers for whom having children isn’t part of their life-path: from those who’ve chosen to remain child free, those who didn’t get to choose, and those whose version of family life looks a whole lot different to what they first envisioned.
Otherhood’s essays are by writers who’ve felt on the outside looking in, who’ve lived unexpected lives, and who’ve given the finger to social expectations. Some chose to be childfree, some didn’t get to choose, and some — through bereavement or blended family dynamics — ask themselves: Am I a mother or am I other?
Morrison also describes ‘Stranded on a shore I never wanted to visit’ by Iona Winter as an essay that ‘talks beautifully and painfully about the loss of her 26-year-old son, including raw diary entries from the months after his passing. “Can I still call myself a mother?” asks Winter, “because this, too, is otherhood.”
All books will be on sale through our festival bookstore PaperPlus Nelson, both through their shop and at their stall at our Pukapuka Talks events. Most authors will be available for book signings after their sessions. You can also buy pukapuka online – please select the Nelson store to collect in person.
Kathryn van Beek (she/her)
Kathryn van Beek was the 2023 Robert Burns Fellow at the University of Otago. Her articles about infertility have appeared on The Spinoff and in the New Zealand Herald. She has written for the award-winning Misconceptions web series, and was the driving force behind the change to the Holidays Act that provides bereavement leave for miscarriage.
Iona Winter (she/her)
Iona Winter (Waitaha, Kāi Tahu) is a widely published kaituhi. As the 2022 CLNZ | NZSA Writers’ Award recipient, she completed a creative non-fiction project addressing the complexities of being bereaved by suicide. In 2023, she launched Elixir & Star Press, a dedicated space for the expression of grief in Aotearoa New Zealand, in memory of her tama, Reuben Samuel Winter.
Henrietta Bollinger (they/them)
Henrietta Bollinger is a writer, activist and disability rights advocate who challenges the norms of our ableist society, asking us to consider better ways of being with each other and ourselves. In their essay, ‘Possible names for myself’, Bollinger speaks to their experiences as a queer, disabled person, and as a twin in amongst the ‘babble of Bollingers’.
Lily Duval (she/her)
Lily Duval is a writer are artist based in Ōhinehou Lyttleton. She is the illustrator of Critters of Aotearoa (written by Nicola Toki), published in 2023, and her illustrated non-fiction book Six-legged Ghosts was published in 2024.
Pukapuka Talks are presented by:
Thank you to:
SUTER THEATRE
Fri 25 Oct | 5.30pm | 60 min
Pay What You Can (PWYC)
16+
Content note: The conversation may touch on topics including suicide bereavement, medical ableism, child uplifts, gender exploration, pregnancy loss, and/or gendered violence against disabled people. It’ll also include joy, humour, and perhaps the odd cheeky swear.